Nothing to Do? Create a Fun Friends’ Study Group at Home

Want something to do in the evenings when you’re bored or lonely? What if you could gather a group of your friends to your home after dinner once a week to have a fun friends’ study group? No special training required for a fun friend’s study group, only a favorite book of your choosing that is therapist recommended. Be sure you feel safe belonging to a group of this kind. If not, decide to seek professional help. The following are fun friends’ study group suggestions.
1. The Dance of Anger By Harriot Lerner
2. Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend
3. Co Dependent No More by Melanie Beatty
4. Emotional Blackmail by Susan Forward, Ph.D.
5. The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron

The fun friends’ study group guidelines that follow can help you set the tone. A main purpose for a group like this is to have fun and share your learning experiences. There doesn’t have to be a leader when you safely set up a reading and sharing group experience. It’s been researched that when women get together as in a group, something chemically changes in their bodies that causes them to feel really good. How about that for fun?

1. Want to learn to speak up and be in control?
2. Want to basically feel good about yourself and not be such a pleaser?
3. Nothing to do after work and dinner?
4. Boyfriend problems or split?
5. Divorced and wanting to share?

What would be these fun friends’ study group guidelines?
1. Have a focus with the choice of book and clarify your goals.
2. Choose members that are stable enough to handle the confrontation and the fun.
3. Pay attention to feelings. Ask, “What are you feeling?”
4. Decide to learn to be flexible
5. Decide to be greedy in your sharing without monopolizing time
6. Level by openly responding when confronted and express your feelings. For example, “I feel frustrated when I hear your comment.”
7. Don’t expect to be understood by the fun friends’ study group. Make it enough for you to be heard.
8. Avoid advising, interpreting, and questioning; instead decide to share your feelings and your own experiences. Tell your personal stories.
9. Let the gossip go (gossip is a form of anger) and maintain a total confidential commitment within the fun friends’ study group.
10. Let go of band-aid help. By rushing in to help or be supportive or comforting someone expressing a painful experience, you disrespect their ability to fully express what they have to say. People grow by living through their pain.
11. Give feedback using “I messages”. If something touches you let them know your reactions whether positive or negative. For example, “I feel so connected to you when I hear your experience.” Be willing to be honest and level, which enhances the level of trust within your fun friends’ study group.
12. Be willing to discover your defenses.

The purpose of fun friends’ study group is to discover your feelings and to identify defenses that prevent honest expression of feelings. While change is a goal, look at the group as a tool to help you to discover yourself at a deeper level. Look at the fun friends’ study group as a place to try out experiential techniques or use new tools that can help you cope and even enjoy your life and your relationships more. Keep the fun friends’ study group light and have fun. 582 words


Must Do Feeling Chart That Can Add to Your Self-Awareness
Use this sheet as a homework assignment to practice being more aware of your feelings. Ask yourself, “What am I feeling? Ask yourself this question at the end of your day and place check mark by the feeling. People often fear their feelings. You need to feel safe in doing this exercise. Don’t attempt it if you feel unsafe. Seek a therapist to work with you. Feelings will become like a partner to be listened to, not feared. If not in therapy share your feelings with a trusted and safe person or friend who will listen, not give advice. Allow feelings to be part of you that can give you signals and clues to lead you to your truth.

Feeling Mon. Tues. Weds. Thurs. Fri. Sat. Sun.
Angry
Sad
Guilty
Lonely
Bored
Embarrassed
Afraid
Anxious
Disappointed
Hate
Happy
Frustrated
Disgusted
Love
Lust
Compassion
Confident
Jealous/envious
Affectionate
Excited
Confused
Resentful

Award winning Dr. Fuller is a recovered eating disorder survivor and a leading eating disorder expert who can show you how to be free of guilt, self hate and eat normally with pleasure and peace of mind. What if you could have the relationship you want or the body you want? You can. Fuller’s Self Help Book, Not Your Mother's Diet can show you how. Launching soon for 24 hours only -FREE bonus gifts and prizes by signing up for email at http://www.notyourmothersdiet.com